I'm Muffin Everywhere..Working at staying Yogic

Wow...this year is just flying by. Seems like only yesterday it was 2008 and here it is, a week has nearly passed of 2009. Okay, okay...I'm just kidding. kinda. It was practically yesterday when it was still 2008. And the year is actually moving along one day at a time. I think it does that because most of us probably couldn't handle things if it went by faster. While I am not one for resolutions each new year's, I do intend to have an intention each day. I said intend. That is not to imply that I actually remember to set some sort of intention each day. I don't. I believe I've heard a quote, "the road to hell is paved with good intentions." and while I can't say I personally subscribe to that belief, what I do believe is that some action is required in order for one's intention(s) to become a reality.

So far this year (well, actually way before '09), I've had the daily intention to maintain some sort of balance in working on my website listings, studying towards my nutrition degree, and reviewing anatomy as I pursue my 200 hour yoga teacher certification. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), I am still human and I find myself procrastinating at times and doing just about ANYthing other than those things in efforts to put off the inevitable...playing an online game, watching a movie, writing in a blog. Uh...er...anyway. You probably get the picture!

So, as a yoga practitioner, student, and teacher, a major intention of mine is to take my yoga practice off of the mat and into my "real" life. Yoga is much more than stretching and achieving a "yoga butt", though as a human, I wouldn't mind that yoga butt I have heard so much about. Really, though, as I work with customers of my online business, focus on nutrition studies, and live my life in general, my daily intention is to BE a yogini...not just physically as in asanas (postures), but in my actions, my words, my thoughts towards others and myself.

It's not always easy, hence the title of my post. Part of my being human is being a 43 year old woman with all sorts of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual changes occuring. A favorite mantra of mine has been "Bodies change and I am not my body." I think I made that up...or I heard it one day and borrowed it. Regardless...when I remember that phrase, I am so much better off. I happen to be somewhat impatient, as well as currently experiencing some of these "body changes" that I would definitely not choose if I had a choice in the matter. Hormones. I heard about it, I was warned about it, but I didn't really believe that I would be affected. Wrong.

Despite the fact that I am physically active, mentally engaged, nutritionally conscious and knowledgeable, there are some changes that are going on and I am not really thrilled about it. So yesterday, when a dear friend noticed a certain part of me that was, in her words (and I am paraphrasing) "a muffin top in the right place"...ie...where some women would pay to have them surgically enhanced...I responded, (again paraphrasing...my memory isn't what it used to be either) "I'm muffin everwhere." Funny but true. Lately, I feel a bit inflated..I know the upper area muffin top thing going on also is reflected in my snug pants and that puffy feeling.

And I am impatient...being a sugar addict and having had NO sugar now for over a good week, nearly 2 weeks actually (ok, more like a week and a half), I feel that any puffiness from the hormones and the holidays' "Desserts Throughout the City" tours which I led and participated in, should have subsided by now. Right? I should be in my 'skinny' jeans..comfortably...I want it now! (channeling Veruca Salt) But I dare not even slide those babies on right now. Afterall, bodies change and I am not my body. I may be muffin everywhere...today...and that is OKAY.

My intention today is not to drop the few pounds I may have found recently, nor to achieve a yoga butt. Today I feel muffin everywhere. But my real goal, if you want to call it a goal, is my intention to have balance. Today, I'll go to a hot vinyasa yoga class, come home to have a healthy, mindful lunch (sans sugar, what I believe to be truly the most addictive drug on the planet) , get some packages ready to ship to customers, and review some anatomy for my yoga intensive weekend coming up this Friday. That's all I need to do for a mindful, balanced day...today. A yoga butt may come one day. Or not. Today, I'll embrace my inner-muffin...and my outer one. Anyway, muffins are yummy.

PS: the 1st photo is one of me which actually is possibly one of my most UN-favorite, MAJOR-muffiny pictures of me in existence. It's nearly 6 years old and is from a time in my life when I was neither mindful nor yogic. I can see this lack of mindfulness showing in me from the inside out. It still me...muffin or not. The 2nd picture is a bit more current...still me!